It's been said that everyone is OCD in some way. I'd have to agree. I wouldn't say I'm excessively ritualistic, but I do have some quirks. Especially in the way that I eat things. My mom's vice is with peanut M&M's - she has a specific way she has to eat each one. Mine is with these little babies:
Now, this picture is of a box of 50. I wish I could say I have a smaller package size, but no. I've got the Costco/industrial/preparing-for-the-apocolypse size. What can I say? They are great -- literally the best fruit snacks I've ever had. And hey, fruit juice is real fruit.... kindof.
Anyway, since you're all interested, I'll let you in on my secret for full fruit-snack enjoyment:
1) First, you have to rip open the package ravenously (this is a requirement and must be fulfilled even if you are not actually hungry, and just eating out of boredom/convenience) and retrieve a single nugget of goodness and promptly stuff it into your mouth. Don't waste time sucking on it or enjoying the flavors/textures... just chew it. Get your molars and gums nice and sticky.
2) Carefully clean your teeth with your tongue. Or leave the little bits for a baby future snack!
3) Select you favorite kind (varies with the day - tonight it was green apple) and set it aside, in a place where you won't forget about it and/or roll on top of it in the middle of the night.
4) Dump the remaining fruit snacks (usually 8-10) in your mouth. No hands required.
5) Suck on these bad boys for a really long time. It is a FRUITSPLOSION! This can take up to 15 minutes, if you're conservative, and can be a very positive time in your life.
6) After the last little fruit nub is dissolved away by the enzymes in your mouth (thank you PD BIO 120) you will be sad that it is all over. But WAIT! There's no need to shed a tear! You, being a clever lass/laddie set aside a precious wad of deliciousness and now get to enjoy that last fruit snack. You may chew a little, and suck a little, no pressure! Just go with the flow. Don't stress out about it.
See? It really is the perfect way to enjoy a li'l bag of these guys. You get to be gluttonous (see steps 1,2,4, and 5) AND guilt-free because you planned it out so very well. It's a win-win-win-win-win-win situation.
You're welcome!
5 comments:
that is weird.
Nicely done. Nicely done.
Sounds delicious! I will try it! But it's probably not very good for your teeth.... 15 minutes of real fruit soaking against tooth enamel probably isn't ideal, let alone 'fruit juice'. Something to consider.
...interesting...
Hey - I figure that my "ritual" for eating peanut M&M's has slowed me down enough in my enjoyment of them that it has saved me from gaining roughly 682 pounds! So, be glad that I do it the way I do! :-) (Otherwise, you wouldn't want to sit next to me in an airplane.)
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