Alright - let's get something straight. I'm not a dumb head, but it's been established that I sometimes am a bit of a late bloomer in comprehending words or phrases. I've got some more that are just DOOZIES! Here are some things that I have only just recently understand/"got."
I would preface this with a, "Don't laugh," but that would be futile. So instead I will advise, "Enjoy!"
"Wake me up, before you go - girl." This catchy little hit by Wham! called Jitterbug got a different meaning when I was severely berated for mis singing the actual lyrics which are apparently, "Wake me up, before you go - go." Which makes less sense, but DOES rhyme better. I like my version more. But still, a great song.
"Baby Gluteus" This is one of my more awkward misunderstandings. Here's the backstory: the epic combination of Mr. Michael Jackson and Mr. Paul McCartney pooped out a great song called "Say, Say, Say." There's a line that Michael sings with great passion and plosive power (even more so than usual, if you can believe it) (also, that was a nice use of alliteration. Unintentional.) that says, "and baby through the years - you know cryin' ooh ooh ooh ooh OOH!" But I always heard it as "baby gluteus" instead of "baby through the years." I'm just sayin...
As far as thee, I can see. Yes, that's what I thought the phrase was. Obviously the real phrase is "as far as the eye can see," but I sorta prefer my version. MY version can be interpreted in two ways. One: I can see as far as you can see. Meh, dec (as in short for decent). But two: I can only see to you - my thoughts are never farther than you. Kindof a sweet sentiment, right?
"God, our strength will be pressed forward." This line from the hymn Called to Serve ACTUALLY reads (sings?) "God our strength will be - press forward." I guess the real version makes a lot more sense because why would someone address God, pause, then continue to inform Him that "our strength will be pressed forward"?
Daydreams. Okay, am I the ONLY person in the world who misunderstood this concept? Until literally about a month ago, I thought a daydream was a dream that you have while you're taking a nap during the day. Makes sense, right? A day - dream! But no, apparently you are actually AWAKE while having a day dream. Since when? Well, since the beginning of time, apparently. My roommate Kelsey and friend Lizzy had to explain that actually, a day dream is just when your mind wanders off and you start to fantasize about things (I was under the crazy impression that these incidences were just called "fantasies" or - "having an imagination"). Now I am overly excited to use the phrase, and throw it in (with unnecessary emphasis on the daydream part) quite often.
"the greatest spindle" Michael Jackson's "Wanna be Startin' Somethin'" is a great song, but not the best example of crisp diction. To be honest, it's one of his more slurry songs. Still great, but I'm just saying that if I was confusing "the greatest spindle" with the actual "the pain is thunder," then either it's way too slurry or my hearing is going out on me at the tender age of 18. Or both.
Head Poncho does not equal Head Honcho. Need I explain more?
"Well you done, done me in your bed - I felt it!" This line from Jason Mraz's "I'm Yours" caused me some distress for some time because I thought that it was worse than the actual, "Well you done done me and you bet I felt it." Thanks Jason.
Alright, (<--- holy, how many times have I started a sentence like this? Seems like too many...) so far these have not been that bad. I mean, really, how was I supposed to know that day dreams weren't actual dreams? And song lyrics.. HeLLO! Everyone mis hears lyrics from time to time. This next one though is quite a shame. Actually - it's probably my worst one yet.
Prehistoric Gandhi. For a great, great portion of my life, I thought that Gandhi, as in, Mahatma Gandhi lived B.C. I don't know why my brain didn't figure out that SINCE I HAD SEEN PHOTOGRAPHS OF HIM, he couldn't possibly have lived B.C., but it didn't. Instead it interpreted the robes and impoverished Indian people as some kind of pre-Messianic prophet/do-gooder.
Yeah... pretty rough, right? Feel free to mock, I know I have!
8 comments:
What? It's not "wake me up before you go-go"??? I'm floored!
No mocking, just empathy. We all have moments like these. For instance, my sisters teased me mercilessly when I sang the Oompa Loompa song from the old Willy Wonka movie with these words: "Blaming the kids is a lie and a shame" (it's really "lion of shame"). Their lyrics don't make all that much sense, so I felt I was doing the song a service, but still.
Ash, you have that backwards. You thought it was a lion of shame and it's really lie and a shame because you're absolutely right, lion of shame makes ZERO sense. :) nice try.
Also, peed a little at "well you done, done me in your bed. I felt it" Dying.
Hmm... Perhaps I was not very clear. The real lyric IS "Wake me up before you go - go" But THAT was the shocker to me. I always had though it was go - GIRL. Does that make sense? Oh and Ash, I don't think ANY of those Oompa Loompa songs make any sense, but now I am confused. Who do I trust? YOU (whom I've known longer and actually... met) or Jen who WAS older at the time and could theoretically have remembered more accurately.
That's really funny, Jen. I thought I remembered it happening the way you said, but I checked a lyrics website just in case and they put "lion of shame." Ha ha. So I guess I'm not the only one...
In conclusion, Melissa, always trust me. I am always right...somehow...
You are way too funny! I miss you!
You should know that Ash has a fuzzy memory whereas I am a human... machine that remembers all things.
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